When the early morning awareness breaks into being, and all pretense has not yet begun to cloak the clarity that sees through you – who are you then?
Who peers out through ‘your’ optical observatories and silently feels… something?
Have you noticed that this noble yet nearly silent captain wakes up with us from the void to perform the vessel’s treacherous re-launch into the sea of Life?
Without this most fair and noble champion, we are unmoored, yet shortly beyond each dawn’s successful launch we tend to slip and turn away from the balanced, present, and clairvoyant captain and allow some of the lesser sailors to insert themselves and steer the ship.
These mariners suffer shortsightedness by way of their addictions, their predispositions, their opinions and preferences and biases. They are loud and common – we are used to their voices running nonstop through our ears and even out of our mouths until we believe they are our own.
There is something we dread in our upcoming day, or perhaps something that one cannot wait to do and are obsessing about – perhaps both of these emotional pulls are true, and perhaps true amongst many others… After a while, who can tell what is real? Which voice are you?
How can one remain connected to Spirit and Ground and flow smoothly when one is also connected to so many competing crude attractions? If we run a wire to power a machine, but include outlets along the line in which we plug in far too many other (often unnecessary/detrimental) power-consuming appliances, we will not get the full force needed to drive forward our original purpose.
Let’s take the idea of the “hara line” the line which descends to us from the heavens, runs through our midline and all our chakras, and allows us to ground our energy into the earth. Perhaps one of the aims of life is to live in such a way that all of God’s goodness poured into and through us is to be circulated, grounded, circulated, and generously returned to the very Source of all for re-circulation throughout creation.
One sober and responsible captain could observe, validate, and facilitate this exchange, but again we run into the almost immediate issue of too many (self-interested) cooks in the cranial kitchen.
Each one has a different agenda, and is diverting God’s good energy to self-interested pursuit. This is not referring to the self-interest of the living being, but rather the self-interest of each particular spirit or inspiration that attempts to impersonate the captain and set the course for the vessel. In the computer world, this type of program that runs silently within the operating system to direct a share of the energy to some particular influential but unseen process is called a “daimon” – think about that.
Living beings are not computers, but we often seem to be able to understand abstract concepts better when given the gift of a little bit of distance from the problem.
It’s important to understand that we are all running our own operating systems – influenced and overwritten all the time by fate, karma, social engineering, angelic/demonic influences, and much more. Our systems are almost always built from the same standardized templates – perfectly fractured to keep us broken and delivered to us through education, culture, and omnipresent social programming.
Broken souls tend to feel the discomfort of their own rough edges, and seek relief or release in all the ways of the world. Instead of remaining as whole as we begin our day, we let our rowdy and uncontrollable impulses raise their voices and take over, and the day becomes about the placation of daimonic forces, and about the diplomacy that attempts to balance unbalanceables.
Later in the day, one of you(r inner voices) has felt joy, another pain. One jealousy, another greed, another misery. Another has felt great pleasure and is struggling to let it go. Another of your competing inner thoughts about who you are and how that is expressed is dissatisfied, still waiting impatiently on its time to drive. None of these exhausting, consuming shadows of your self is pure of God or even of you.
Who are you?